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* * * * * 5 votes

RPHGate: A Peer Reviewed Study into the Child Grooming Gangs of the Sun and the RPH Start Zone

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#1 funtcase


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:26 PM

RESEARCHERS: Reuben Ashwing, et al. (2019)

Paedophiles on RPH are a problem, much like the Old Gods of Azeroth. They are everywhere, they don't seem to die and they infect our home planet - in other words, they seek to make RPH into a LOTR themed paedophile den of inequity. So, as dutiful researchers, we have gathered data over several months - if not years - to identify and fully implicate these paedophiles and hopefully save children from their wrath.

MISSION: Through logic, evidence and hard data, prove that the most influential and powerful guild on RPH is grooming and preparing children for disgusting "In Character" rituals and molestation.


Welcome, ladies, gentlemen, children and... regrettably, paedophiles to...



Unlike most studies, we have provided evidence and data that we have painstakingly compiled in order to provide you with a more rounded and reasoned approach to judging these paedophiles and seeing them for what they are.


Firstly, the hard core evidence gathered while undercover. In order for this particular ring to believe us, we had to role play as a scale 0.7 blood elf with mageweave on, with several LOTR references in our TRP, including some shit about trees and world building. 


We have chosen to censor some of the content, either due to the extremely graphic nature or to protect the child victims of this scandal. 




Figure 1: Paedophile Confirmed


The evidence is incontrovertible. In pedo-speak (a sort of online paedophile code language) the user named 'Adora' (known on Deviant Art as Kenneth87) agreed to 'pedo confirmed'. This means that the fact he is a paedophile has quite literally been confirmed. In a court of law this would be considered a full admission of guilt.



Figure 2: Threatening and Brutal ERP in a locked Phase?


Here you can see their ring leaders, Ark and Adora, planning what they call a 'Fellowship', where they pull children into their guild in order to 'ERP in a private locked phase'. We have been tracking these two individuals for a long time. Both Ark and Adora appear to be obsessed with the franchise Lord of the Rings, and they use this code language of LOTR references in order to talk further about their planned activities within their guild.





Figure 3:


What Ark and Adora (the ring leaders) don't want you to know is that they ran a LOTR themed dark web marketplace (think silkroad for nerdy people buying illegal Legolas and Sylvanas plushies). Ark and Adora exit scammed this dark web marketplace after getting caught abusing a "hobbit", which was a common code for a kid on their website, while the abuser was known as a "gandolf". This is despite the fact that Gandalf is factually the headmaster of Hogwarts, which is a completely different universe to LOTR. It's clear their love of this book is really just a front and useful coding system for them to abuse children in a clandestine manner. 



Figure 4: Child Grooming... "of the Sun"


If you take a close look at Adora and Ark's guild's name, you can see that they are actively attempting to recruit children into their guild, even going so far as to use "children" in the title of their sick paedo ring. This is either one of two things, a dark attempt at being ironic (some pedo in joke), or otherwise a clever guise to make children feel welcome and among other children when in fact they are in danger.


But what if this is just an "RP guild" you say? Please, read on. They admit themselves that the objective of this guild is nothing to do with the epic Blizzard franchise...




Figure 5: Catching them in the Arkt


This is self-explanatory, the evidence is just matching up now. But if you still need convincing, we've collated the most conclusive of our data in easily digestible graphs.




So, what do we have so far? 


We've identified the two main culprits. Ark and Adora. They are the true paedophiles running this Grooming Gang... of the Sun. So, what about Ark and Adora personally? We know a few things. One, that they love Lord of the Rings. Adora once said to me that he'd "fuck a hobbit if it wasn't so hairy, and if they were under age" (2019:02).


However, what of Ark? That's simple:



Figure 6: The Truth

This graph is pretty clear, and we could place Ark on this pretty clearly. They make a lot of Lord of the Rings references, and often get annoyed when you don't get them... or is that what they want you to think? Who's to say that the references are just - once again - codes for abusing children.




Figure 7: Simple Mathematics 


This is pure deductive reasoning. Do we really need to explain this? Ark and Adora clearly fit within these well documented and mathematically plausible paedophile activities. 




Figure 8:




Lastly, we have what we believe to be pictures of the culprits. Gathered from the Middle Earth Market which adora and ark operated on for several years... So remember, should you ever encounter these people in real life, then beware:



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#2 THE traius

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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:30 PM

my god i was blind

confirmed to be the god of roleplay through intense divination

#3 Titiantree


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:32 PM

They make a lot of Lord of the Rings references, and often get annoyed when you don't get them... or is that what they want you to think? Who's to say that the references are just - once again - codes for abusing children.


wait... is that what adora meant when he messaged me, 'in the darkness: bind them'? what the fuck?? 

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#4 Tazzy


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:43 PM

we were fools in men's shoes

an entire fuck

#5 ShaOfPride


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:46 PM

listen guys you dont have to call him the hobbit. his real name is traius the bottomfeeder.

Come, face me. Give in to your pride. Show me your "greatness".

kill shaoflust he is a heretic

#6 Red Dorage

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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:47 PM

this nigga made graphs, if u look at this topic and dont comment and like ill come to ur house and steal ur pets

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#7 Krenan


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:49 PM


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#8 RichHomieVoraka



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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:51 PM


Voraka Zin'rah - Gurubashi Warlord X

Jokbawa - Jungle Troll Cannibal X


Rocket Fizzwatts

Edmond Web




#9 ShaOfPride


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:53 PM


listen we've tried to make contact but all efforts are flawed. 

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Come, face me. Give in to your pride. Show me your "greatness".

kill shaoflust he is a heretic

#10 Mains Uther

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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:56 PM

Fuck time to sell my Lotr books and all my games.



#11 Tazzy


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 10:57 PM

gonna make a call out post on my twitter dot com. . . .
the children of the sun are bitch ass motherfuckers they pissed on sha's fucking wife. . .

an entire fuck

#12 Vellectra


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:00 PM



#13 Adora Nightshade

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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:01 PM

lmao this is pretty good.

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#14 Sashka5337


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:04 PM

man this brings a whole new meaning to the phrase "I see you"

(Good piece of satire)
Deus Vult

#15 halstead



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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:05 PM


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im halstead


#16 Mercer


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:07 PM

Children of the Moon when.
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#17 ShaOfPride


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:07 PM

lmao this is pretty good.

The entire horde of RPH comes riding on their worgs of assumption armed with their hammers of judgment. Adora Nightshade is quickly slaughtered by the hor-- WAIT! It's not over! ADORA PULLS OUT THE: "i agree with this so i am at no fault" or is it merely a facade for... "i will disguise my intentions with a sarcastic comment." Either way, comparisons between Adora and Nathanos is clear. Nathanos said: "ENOUGH!" Adora has done so. Nathanos is undead. There are undeads within Lord of the Rings. Cannot deny that.

Come, face me. Give in to your pride. Show me your "greatness".

kill shaoflust he is a heretic

#18 Revontheus1746


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:10 PM

"Show me, on this anatomically incorrect doll'dorei, where they touched you."


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#19 Esadan


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:13 PM

by the gods


the dots are connecting

imagine unironically being a roleplayer

#20 Bullfred


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Posted 05 February 2019 - 11:18 PM